Realization
by doglover90
Summary: My take on a missing scene from episode 7 and what happens in between episodes 7 and 8. trigger warning: contains rape


Callie felt the multitude of paralyzing thoughts whirl through her head; all of the remnants of her emotional day and the resurfacing of the shattering incident she wanted so badly to forget about but couldn't. Seeing Sarah in group was like seeing a miniature version of herself, the semi-innocent fourteen year old, reminded her of herself, before the cold and impersonal foster system and the trauma of mother's death and her father's imprisonment could completely yank away any chance at her childhood. The creepy face Callie had once thought was a friend, someone in her lonely world that actually cared, someone who took time to listen to her- took away her happiness in best home Jude had ever been in, and her careless actions with Liam had caused it to ruin everything for her innocent little brother. Jude had to be taken out of a good home and tossed into another below par one all because of Callie's recklessness and selfishness.

But today the shattering thought had entered her mind: She had said **no**. She had said she wasn't ready. She tried to push him off. She yelped in pain and fear when he'd pounced on her, his hand shoved over her mouth to stifle it. She kicked and struggled, powerless against the young man forcing himself on her. It wasn't her choice. It wasn't her fault. It came to her the second Brandon had said, "It's up to her now. It's her choice," But it really wasn't. Callie couldn't allow it on her conscience for Liam to do this to another helpless girl. The foster system sucked enough to begin with; sexual abuse was just uncalled for. Suddenly, she could see herself on the extra-long twin bed at the seemingly safe and comfortable Olmsted house, lying on top of the pink flowered bedspread, with a nineteen year old man on top of her, slapping her down and warning her to be quiet if she wanted Jude to be safe.

"Callie," Brandon gasped. "I'm sorry. I didn't realize it was that far. Of course it wasn't your fault if you said no. And even if you didn't, he was over 18 right? You couldn't consent. That's rape."

"Brandon, I know," Callie sighed. "But you know it doesn't matter. We're just foster kids. No one will believe us. And even if they do believe that I didn't want it, if they know that I've been sexually abused that will be on my record too. Most people do not want to bring a kid that was sexually abused into their home. Too much trauma to deal with and putting their own kids at risk".

"Callie, "Brandon objected. "I know you're worried about your file, but I really think you should tell my moms about this. They can help you decide what to tell Bill, or even talk to him for you. They're a cop and a vice principal, they've been in situations similar to this before, they've gone through the foster parent training, we've fostered other kids before, they'll have a better idea of how to handle this than we do, and then the report could come from an adult instead of you."

"But what if they decide to send me away?" Callie protested.

"They won't", Brandon replied firmly. "They care about you, and especially after this they will want to make sure you're taken care of. They don't want to make you someone else's problem. If Bill wanted you in a group home they would fight it. They said this was your and Jude's last way station until you find a permanent home and they meant it. And they know you and Jude need to be together. My moms do not break promises they are not like that". Brandon couldn't understand this entire obsession over a file. Foster kids always carried some risk, and that was what foster parents signed up for. But really all kids are risky, and just need parents to love them and safe homes to live in.

Callie looked down at the ground, hiding the tears that were beginning to well up in her eyes. It was hard enough for her to tell Brandon, and she couldn't believe what she had just blurted out. She didn't know if she could bring herself to tell Stef and Lena, even if they were the best foster parents she ever had. She did not want to talk about and relive it, and she knew that Stef and Lena would be mandated to report it. But she still felt responsibility for what could happen to Sarah if she didn't do anything. But even more overwhelming she worried about Jude; she had finally landed him in a great home by accident, and did not want to ruin it again like she had at the Olmstead's. She totally understood what Sarah said when she felt happy and safe at the Olmstead's. But, that she realized, was the problem. Callie was not safe then, and Sarah could not be safe there either.

"Okay, if you think they can help Sarah get out of this" Callie replied. "But you know, this would make it even harder for me and Jude to get a permanent home".

"My moms said you could stay here however long you need" Brandon reminded her gently.

"Okay, can you take me home please and we can talk to them," Callie requested.

Callie took a deep breath as she walked through the threshold of the warm and inviting Fosters home with Brandon at her side, looking into the living room and seeing Stef and Lena sprawled out on the couch. She felt a twinge of guilt knowing they would be anything but relaxed with the news she was about to spring on them.

"Where were you?" Lena asked as she saw her two oldest kids walk in. That day had shown her the importance of always keeping tabs on your kids.

"Oh, I took Callie to group," Brandon stated.

"That was nice of you," Stef responded.

"Did you share, Callie?" Lena asked, following up on their conversation earlier.

"I did," Callie nodded, sitting on the chair and facing her foster moms.

"I'll let you talk" Brandon told her, standing by the chair as he started turning to leave.

"No, you can stay," Callie replied softly. Having Brandon there would be a comfort and encouragement to her.

Stef and Lena sat up straight on the couch and looked gently at Callie, signaling they were ready to listen. Callie had quickly observed how quickly these women were ready to drop everything when a kid needed something, even just their foster kid.

Callie gulped and started, knowing it was the sensible thing to do at this point. Even if she ended up in a group home, surely Stef and Lena would keep Jude and he would be safe and happy here. She began to speak, feeling her foster moms' soft eyes watching her; their faces looking concerned like they had an idea that the type of information she was about to disclose was indeed sensitive. Callie realized didn't want to waste any more of their time then she needed to, so she figured it was time to start talking.

Callie heard her voice murmur tentatively, "A little while ago I was living with another family. It was a pretty good situation there. They had a boy living with them, their son, actually, Liam". Callie rubbed her nose tensely, and continued, "He paid attention to me, which I wasn't used to and I really liked. He told me that I was special, and I believed him". She paused to wipe away a single tear that started to fall. Callie would tear up occasionally, but she only cried when she was alone. "And then, that was when it started to get inappropriate. I know the rules, but…" Callie looked at Stef and Lena with wide eyes, an expression of guilt and embarrassment, scared to continue. She normally masked her emotions well, not wanting to give anyone an upper hand with her, but with these women her walls were breaking down.

Stef and Lena exchanged a glance, they had a feeling where this may be going, but they needed to hear this from Callie. A crucial step in both her healing process and allowing them to earn her trust would be opening herself up emotionally. "Oh Callie, you don't need to justify yourself to us. Go on, sweets." Stef reassured her. They patiently waited for her to continue.

Callie nervously rubbed her fingers against her knee, looked back up Stef and Lena with her wide, vulnerable eyes and continued. "We would spend a lot more time together, alone, and at first I was okay with it because it meant I was getting more attention and I felt like I mattered to someone besides Jude. But one night, he came into my room, and he told me that, that….he wanted to have sex with me," Callie exhaled, a single tear rolling down her check. She continued, "I told him no, that I wasn't ready, but he said he didn't care, and he forced me… to have sex with him".

She closed her eyes and looked down, trying to control her breathing for a long moment, then felt a hand rubbing up and down her arm. She looked up and saw Stef. "Oh, Callie. I'm so sorry. You know that this wasn't your fault, yes?"

"Yeah," Callie nodded. "I do now at least".

On Callie's other side, Lena squeezed her shoulder gently. "Thank you for telling us this, honey".

Stef looked at Callie gently and said, "There is a lot more we need to talk about. But why don't we take a break, yeah? Have you eaten dinner yet?"

Callie shook her head.

Lena spoke up, saying "All right, we haven't had a chance to make dinner, we've had a busy day-". Seeing the guilty look on Callie's face she added, "Oh no, sweetie, it's not your fault. We're really glad you trusted us with this. Now we get to have takeout tonight. The other kids will be excited. What would you like? Pizza, Chinese, Mexican?"  
"It doesn't matter", Callie shrugged. "Whatever everyone else wants. I'm not really hungry anyways".

"Oh no, sweets, you get to pick tonight," Stef insisted, with a small smile. "And you haven't eaten since this morning, you really do need to eat something". Although she was filled with anger, she tried to speak in her best, reassuring mom voice (working with rape cases was always hard for her as justice rarely happened, but knowing that her foster daughter hurt enraged her even more).

"I like Mexican", Callie relented.

"Okay, you want to come with me to pick up it for everyone" Stef grabbed her keys, put her arm around Callie's shoulder and led her out to the car.


End file.
